Post Your Jokes Here

Airplane passengers watch nervously as two men wearing pilots' uniforms and dark glasses use canes to feel their way into the cockpit. The plane starts barreling down the runway, and the passengers begin to get scared as the water at the end of the airstrip nears. With only a few yards left, everyone screams, but the plane lifts off just in time. The passengers think it was all a joke, while in the cockpit, the pilots high-five.

"You know", says one pilot to the other, "one day they're gonna scream too late, and we're all gonna die."

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A worldwide survey was conducted by the UN. The only question asked was:"Would you please give your honest opinion about solutions to the food shortage in the rest of the world?"
The survey was a huge failure...
In Africa they didn't know what "food" meant.
In Eastern Europe they didn't know what "honest" meant.
In Western Europe they didn't know what "shortage" meant.
In China they didn't know what "opinion" meant.
In the Middle East they didn't know what "solution" meant.
In South America they didn't know what "please" meant.
And in the USA they didn't know what "the rest of the world" meant

Continier zot aster.

Ok bon moi si mo ena 1, li pa tro comik selmen, parer zot a gidji gidji zot em.

Ena 1 dimune li p marse marser ek li trouve 1 champs de canne vert, li gagne extra per ek li kumence sover, li vire virer pou guet derriere aprer li continier sover.

kan li p aler li tap avk 1 tifi QEC ek li gagne super per, li continier sover.

kan li ariv lakaz, li rente lor net ek li connect lor forum mbb ek la b li gagne 1 criz cardiac telmen line per.

tou sa la akoz sa boug la ti perver (per vert)




ok, forcer pou riyer now!

lol



To fer moi rapelle pou suggest MBB change sa couleurr forum la acoz moi aussi mo pervert

There will probably be a change in the color scheme later. For now you will have to manage to fright Slasher!

MBB to p fr par expres pou fr Koonul per la! pa bon!

thembb wrote:There will probably be a change in the color scheme later. For now you will have to manage to fright Slasher!

Sa veut dir ki mo bizin continuer mette mo ray-ban kan mo vine lor forum ici

slasher wrote:

thembb wrote:There will probably be a change in the color scheme later. For now you will have to manage to fright Slasher!

Sa veut dir ki mo bizin continuer mette mo ray-ban kan mo vine lor forum ici

hmmm morinn si p dir couleur la pa bon. mo truv li zoli mwa couleur la. en passant si mo pa tromper zot cav soizir zot propre color scheme parla. ene ta forum cav fer sa.

Pa bonnnnnn... zone bizin met qec :/ Pa sanz color scheme la, le vert c bien rafraichi lizier Slasher bizin kne combattre so fear

lol, mo p kumence trouve vert la seryer moi si!

Friendship between Women:

A woman didn't come home one night. The next day she told her husband
that she had slept over at a girlfriend's house. The man called his
wife's 10 best friends. None of them knew anything about it.



Friendship between Men:

A man didn't come home one night. The next day he told his wife that he
had slept over at a buddy's house. The woman called her husband's 10
best Friends. Eight of them confirmed that he had slept over, and two
claimed that he was still there.

LOL. Mari rier mne rier ar sa.

Wahahahaha! Li kuyon :p

lol! mo pa conten bne jokes cot ena adultere

mai sanla comik selmen! mai bne zom couyon kan mem, zot bizin confirm ek sakene avan ki zot tou dir wai li kot moi! lol

sa joke la fr moi pense to bne cam jev, zot genre "wai li la em la, li dan toilet" lol

kan mo ban cam ine dir twa sa.

FOR SALE BY OWNER
Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica. 45 volumes. Excellent condition. 1,000.00 or best offer. No longer needed. Got married last weekend. Wife knows fucking everything

Et voila.. Enkor n ti cado. En passant mo pa contre mariage mwa hein.. Je tm morinn.

lol! to esperer to pena britannica kot toi!

Sii mo ena.. Frantou..

to pou bizin vender alor!

Non acoz to pa cne narien. :P

I received an email featuring the following joke about name derivatives.

Arnold Swadizanconnelaguerre

Mike Taillezong
Brad Putte
Demi Mort
Coffee Hannan
Mahen Ballack
Hari Kewal
Vikash Radebe
Harri Puttar
Paress Rawal
Count Drunkula
Lady McBreath
King Thong
George Clowney
Christina La geule le rat
Jacques Santipi
Michael Jaykisoon
Feroce Khan
Albezsec Bachan
Le Serment d'Hypocrite (pou sa ban docteur ki content cash la)

Ki bizin fer kan arrive devant 1 robo dans trafik?

Rouz - mo chombo
Vert - mo perser vite vite
Oranz - mo chiker...mo aller mo pas aller?

Air Mauritius

Ashvin was leaving Mauritius and travelling on the plane for the first time and was travelling to the UK. No need to say with the excitement of his whole family with his depart "mo garson p alle Langleterre!"

His mum made sure that Ashvin's hand luggage was full of food.. Dhal Puris, zasaar (pickles), alouda, curry poulet and Vindai Orit.

When on board on his flight to the UK he sat next to an english bloke. the english bloke knew how boring the flight would be and he was trying his very best to make a conversation but had no luck. When dinner was being served on the place the hostess approached ashvin asking him if he preferred vegetarian or chicken meal. Ashvin said its ok he has his own food.

Ashvin took out his dhal puri carri poulet and vindai orit and of course with the zassar. The english bloke found his opportunity to make his conversation and said "what is that your eating there?"

Ashvin replies "bread Mauritius" (Dhal Puri) and "what is that?" the english man says. "Zis is carry chicken mauritius and carry orit mauritius".

"Ah I c" says the english bloke.

"And wat is this pink drink?" says the english bloke.

"ah this is drink mauritius ALOUDA"

"hmm looks nice" says the english bloke.

After a couple of hours ashvin releases some silent gas from his rear. And the english bloke smells sumthing really weird and says "my gosh what is that smell"

Ashvin hesitated and then quickly said "Hmm o this is AIR MAURITIUS!

Those mauritian jokes are awesome. I'll try 2 find some more of them!

Here are some truths zat may hurt!

1.Your parents think you're doing you're homework but you're on msn...

2.You have 'Mauritius' T-shirts with sunsets and dolphins and a stash of Ralph Lauren shirts from that factory everyone goes to.

3.There's a karom board lodged in a corner of your house somewhere.

4.The only time you play karom is in Mauritius.

5.You have an uncle who's like, a karom champion.

6.You got uncles and cousins back home who are badminton champions.

7.Your favourite food is Rougaille but you tell all your white friends 'Spaghetti Bolognese'

8.You have sega music on your computer.

9.Your parents secretly know how to dance sega so do you.. Well its not hard now is it? alalilaaaaa

10.You have bare fresh cousins flocking into Australia saying they come to study but end up dossing and partying more than you.

11.You've tried 'Fair and Lovely' cream at some point and so has all your cousins but it dried out your skin/gave you a rash, so you thought...hmmm no.you haven't told anyone you tried 'Fair and Lovely'.

12.The biryani at your uncles wedding was done by a guy called 'chi bhai'

13.Every family occasion consists of biryani, followed by lamousse.

14.You don't really like lamousse yet get forced to eat the filling dessert after being stuffed with biryani.

15.Biryani and lamousse always taste better in Mauritius.

16.Your parents already start buying stuff to bring for family in Mauritius a year before they actually go.

17.Mauritius family never bring anything truly decent when they come to Australia/canada/UK apart from fris cristalise, piment confi, those twiggy crisps, vanilla tea, zasaar.

18.Kraft cheddar is the only cheese you eat and there's always a stash of boxes that never seem to finish somewhere in the fridge or a cupboard.

19.You get really excited when you hear about a Mauritian party somewhere because it gives you warm sense of identity on the inside but yet go to check out the opposite sex and hope they're not your cousin.

20.Most Mauritians are related to you in some way or other that only your dad can figure out.

21.Your mum/dad call Mauritius using cheap phonecards at like 6 in the morning so that 'la lin la clear'.They still spend half an hour trying to figure out who they're talking to.

22.You're family from Mauritius never seem to call home though.

23.You're parents drink tea almost every hour and you've been taught to make it since you was like 2 years old.

24.Tea in Mauritius always tastes better.

25.There's never a weekend where 'kompanye' don't randomly turn up.

26.Your dad and uncles and all your family back in Mauritius either support Liverpool or Man United.

27.There's valeez on top of your wardrobe.

28.There's ribbons on the handles because that's the only way your mum believes she will recognise them, but they so tatty you can spot the suitcases a mile off anyways.

29.Your whole generation comes to see you in the week before you go to Mauritius.. But only because they want you to take parcels back home for them "to capaav amen en parcel pour mo MAMA!!"

30.Your luggage is like a tonne overweight but yet your parents argue with check-in people.Your dad then tries to find someone Mauritian working at the airport that he supposedly knows.

31.You're one of the only Mauritian people on the plane and have more hand luggage than everyone else put-together.That's because you're taking so many random gift requests when going there and bringing back so much zasaar and piment confi that leaks when returning.

32.The whole of Mauritius comes to pick you up from the Mahebourg airport upon arrival.

33.The first things uncles and aunties in Mauritius say when they see you is "gette coumant lin vin graaand" and "qui class to pe faire?"

34.Mosquitoes suck the living daylights out of your sweet blood.

35.The whole of Mauritius comes to drop you off at the airport when you're returning to home..and you always go 6 hours before the plane departs then just doss around the airport after checking-in and still manage to be late boarding the plane.

36.Your parents are always shocked by how quickly Mauritius 'pe devlopeh' yet you still think its look exactly the same since the last time you went the year before.

37.Mauritius family think your richer than the queen just because 'to anglais'.

38.Your mum gets excited when she sees part of a Bollywood film shot in Mauritius and thinks she can see your uncles house.

39.You just can't get enough of good old Mauritian dholl puri.

40.Your parents think Thermogene (vapour rub) is the cure for everything.

41.Whenever you're ill, random aunties give some next style remedies "buoille en peu cresson lerla to kraaz zaizam avec to boir li sek".

42.How many vieux pairs of sulyeh and savat are in the cupboard under the stairs?

43.You love to eavesdrop if you can hear people speaking Creole in a public place and you feel like your part of some secret society because you can understand what they're saying.

44.You have that random filthy rich uncle somewhere in the suburbs who has 10 cars and a 10 bedroom house and the only family occasion they would turn up to is a rare wedding.

45.You have a gold or silver braclet made in mauritius with ur name on it in capital letterz.

46. You drink alouda plein plein.. hehe..


Taken from Wazeeland 1.5 : LINK

Il ya aussi, you know you're Mauritian when you join a brethren specially created for mauritians to promote your blog.